Welcome to the return of the Rapid-Fire Appearances – September 2009 Edition, covering most things SNL and MADtv for the month of September. For the sake of time/space/preference, I have decide to focus on current/recently departed SNL cast members and for the few busy MADtv cast members.

To kick things off, let’s look into the lives of our former MADtv stars.

Orlando Jones’ latest film, “Beyond a Reasonable Doubt” is in limited release September 11th. To coincide with the release, Jones is appearing on BET’s “The Wendy Williams Show.” Also look out for Orlando in the upcoming John C. Riley movie “Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant” this October.

September 18th marks the opening of Steven Soderbergh’s “The Informant!” with Matt Damon. As previously reported by Planet Sketchcom (in an article unable to be found by yours truly) Andrew Daly and Arden Myrin make appearances in the film. Per Arden’s Twitter, her part isn’t big enough to warrant any press or talk shows. Arden continues to make the rounds on Chelsea Lately as a roundtable guest, most recently appearing on September 9th.

Fans of Mad Men may have noted that Crista Flanagan returned as Lois. It’s unclear if we’ll see her pop up again, but rest assured, she’s still employed with Sterling-Cooper.

Fresh off baby number two, Nicole Sullivan returns to her hit Lifetime series "Rita Rocks" October 5th.

Dipping into the waters of SNL, our recently departed Casey Wilson and her writing partner June Diane Raphael come off the success of their 2009 movie “Bride Wars” with 2010 lady comedy “Ass Backwards,” with previous SNL co-star Kristen Wiig slated to appear.

Kristen Wiig currently appears in Mike Judge’s “Extract,” which has been receiving less than stellar reviews. Her next movie role is as Malice in Wonderland in Drew Berrymore’s upcoming directorial debut, “Whip It,” alongside 2007 host Ellen Page. For those of you with HBO, Kristen will also appear in Jason Schwartzman’s “Bored to Death,” which premieres September 20th.

Amy Poehler’s NBC comedy “Parks and Recreation” found its way to DVD yesterday, and the second season begins next Thursday, September 17th. Amy will be hitting the New York morning talk circuit on the 16th, visiting both the “Today” show and “The View.”

Though I’m mostly ignoring the older cast members, it’s worth mentioning that SNL original Chevy Chase’s new show “Community” has been added to NBC Comedy Thursdays, and has positive buzz surrounding it. If it’s a hit remains to be seen, as it premieres the same night as “Parks and Rec.”

Apatow-favorite Bill Hader will appear on “The Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien” on the 11th to promote the September 18th opening of his movie “Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.” Also voicing characters in the movie are fellow cast mates Will Forte and Andy Samberg.

For those looking to see a movie recently released, look out for a couple SNL-ers in the following:

• Tina Fey voicing a character in “Ponyo.”
• Tracy Morgan voicing a character in “G-Force.”
• Fred Armisen in “Post Grad.”
• Will Ferrell and Rob Riggle in “The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard.”
• Casey Wilson in “Julie and Julia.”
• Mike Myers in “Inglorious Basterds.”

SNL returns September 26th with host Megan Fox and musical guest U2.

Should you find any other SNL/MADtv appearances for the month of September newsworthy, feel free to post them. My personal philosophy is that if said cast member hasn’t appeared on the show since 2000 but are still relevant in the entertainment industry, perhaps they’re “too big” for Planet Sketchcom. They have escaped the throngs on sketch comedy and are stars in their own rights. But if you want the world to know that Shrek Forever After and Iron Man 2 are coming out soon, feel free to post it. I have mad love for all cast members, I just prefer to focus on those who need the publicity. Except Jimmy Fallon. Jimmy Fallon never deserves publicity.

celebrity-babies.com — It's a boy for Nicole Sullivan! The actress and husband Jason Packham welcomed son Beckett Edward Packham this morning, Monday August 31st, in Los Angeles. [...]

On this Monday's July 6th, 2009 new episode of Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List, not only will frequent guest Mr. Michael McDonald be guest starring again, but the current star of Rita Rocks and Michael's former partner in crime for 3 years on MADtv will also be appearing in the episode. If you haven't figured it out by now (which if you haven't seriously, how thick is your head?) it's non other than Mrs. Nicole Sullivan. Could we be seeing the reunion of the 2 cast members who brought us such great characters like Clyde and Judith ("Literally"), and Frank and Susan Caydel? I know I hope so!

Here is a press release.

"Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List” (10 p.m. on Bravo): After failing to win a Grammy, Kathy decides to try to reclaim the spotlight by writing a tell-all book about her friends and family. Michael McDonald (“MADtv”) and Nicole Sullivan (“Rita Rocks”) guest star".

Another soul will soon be entering the folds of the MADtv family, as Nicole Sullivan, is expecting her 2nd child in the coming summer.

Nicole, who brought us such great characters as The Vancome Lady and Antonia on our wonderful show, had her first child Dashel ‘Dash’ Pierce Packham a mire 21 months ago, and is reported as “so excited” to be expecting her second child. This will be her second child with husband Jason Packham, whom she met on the set of The King of Queens where he was apart of the production staff.

But with a new baby comes a problem. What will happen with her show Rita Rocks? Well, that is covered, as the show has announced that Nicole's pregnancy will be worked into the show, giving Rita a 3rd child.

If you are any kind of MADtv fan out there, I am sure that you are happy to see one of the shows most bright and shining stars issuing in another life into her family. Nicole, If you ever come around to see this we at Planet MADtv congratulate you on your 2nd child, and offer the hope for a safe and healthy delivery.

Now as we all know it is the holidays and it has been a tough holiday. With the cancellation of the show and the episodes counting down there is very little cheery things to talk about, well if you’re looking for cheery, stuff these cast appearances under your tree!

Let's start off with a small piece cast member. This cast member is Anjelah Johnson? Who is coming back to television, well at least the cable part of that television. According to this Anjelah has been hired to a new untitled show starring fat to fabulous Jenny Craig star Valerie Bertinelli coming to TBS. I do not know when, but it should be soon. The plot of the show is Valerie plays Claire, a recent divorcee who works at a lumber business. Anjelah may be playing the daughter Claire. I don't know how old this daughter is suppose to be but for the Anjelah fans, what does it matter, she is back on TV. Let's hope this role lasts longer than 4 episodes.

Looking for some more sweets under the tree, may I suggest a candy key hanging off the Christmas tree. A Keegan-Michael Key. There is some information about him, and a movie role. Looking for a movie to see this weekend, well why not get your MAD on with the new movie Role Models, not only does this movie have former ghetto nails castmember Nicole Randall Johnson is also has a small appearance from Mr. Key as well. The appearance by what I have heard is only about 20 seconds long with barely any lines, but as Horton of Horton Hears a Who would say if he was a big, well mediocre movie producer, a role is a role no matter how small. It may be a 20 second scene now, but who knows, that could balloon, to 40, 80, and then maybe a movie for Mr. Key. Let's hope that this role is the beginning of many, as this appearance may bring Keegan's career to a Ho Nava Laval.

What's that, you all want MOre. Well I do have some Mo for you. Mo Collins that is. After taking a bit of a break from television Mo is hitting the television screen hard. Along with a web series called Road to the MLS Cup in which she takes Major League Soccar players and the trophy across country to the finals in Los Angeles, she has also appeared on an episode of the show. Pushing Daisies playing a nun who tragically dies after falling out a window, and now has a recurring role on the long too long running of the show According to Jim playing Emily, a 2-time wife with 2 kids who is going to be marrying main character Jim's best friend Andy. With all these roles it's only a matter of time before we find Mo Collins on her own show under the television Christmas tree.

Now, here's a possible gift from a Christmas past in the form of Barack Obama. It looks as if former cast member and Funkenstine walker Jordan Peele is trying to stay on the sketch comedy train. He is one of 4 people who are competing to be the new Obama on MADtv rival Saturday Night Live Does he have the stuff that Keegan has to make it, or will this be just a fun experiment of his. Only time will tell, but you can see for yourself here.

Now here's a present you already know but you love to hear about. This present is filled with a light and sweet inner core. That inner core is MADtv alum Nicole Sullivan. The outside, a wonderful show called Rita Rocks. After years of supporting roles and failed shows, Nicole may have finally latched onto a winner. The show premiered back in August on the Lifetime Network and is doing great in the ratings. After its 8 episode trial, Lifetime has picked it up for a full season order to bring the shows first season up to 20 episodes. 7 years after leaving MADtv, it finally seems like Nicole may have found her most desired Christmas gift of all. A starring role in a successful show.

Ever have a Christmas present that you loved but did not last as long as you wanted it to? Well that is a good segway into another active former MADtv star Nicole Randall Johnson. After being let go for reasons this day we still don't understand, Nicole seems to have found her groove outside of the show. She had a small role in the previously mentioned Role Models, a guest appearance on the new NBC show Kath and Kim, and an appearance on the hit cult kids show Hannah Montana. It may be soon time that she herself gets her own show.

Now, here's a present that has its problems, but you still love it. This gift is Artie Lange who, after another stint in rehab in September is back on the scene and with a new book Too Fat to Fish. You wouldn't think Artie would be that much of a writer but his book has gone to #1 on the New York Times best sellers list in only its first few weeks. Artie gives hope to the many of us, and proves that even a fat, drug-addicted, drunk can make a bestselling book. If he can do this, maybe there is hope for the world after all.

Now the best of all on Christmas is the gift that keeps on giving, that gift that keeps on giving are 2 shows in which hiring former castmembers for guest appearances seems to be as custom for the show as turkey in the Christmas meal. One show is Chocolate News, a satirical news show from a black perspective that has already had Jordan Peele, Keegan-Michael Key, and Mo Collins. Another show hiring MAD members is a show by a former MAD member. That former member is Frank Caliendo and his show FrankTV. The roles Frank's show is giving the former castmembers are all roles that they perfected on MADtv. These include Aries Spears as Shaquille O'Neal, Mo Collins as Mary Tyler Moore, and even Pat Kilbane (who wasn't even on the show when Frank was there) as Howard Stern. The cancellation of MADtv is sad, but with shows like CN and Frank, MADtv may live silently in Hollywood for the next few years with its wonderful actors helping to keep the shows memory alive.

Now, for appearances in Hollywood, the presents have been a plenty. So many that it would take till next Christmas to tell them all, so let’s just summarize the other appearances in short points which I will call stocking stuffers.

Ike Barinholtz: Guest starring role on Rita Rocks last month.

Lisa Donovan: Worked backstage at Youtube Live last month.

Kathryn Fiore: Did Pizza Hut commercials in the summer.

Michael McDonald: Guest starred on Hannah Montana this month.

Eric Price: Will be in a new internet web show called Action Auto. Starting this January.

Will Sasso: On an episode of How I Met your Mother this month.

Mary Scheer: Is appearing on the show iCarly as one of the child’s mothers.

Taran Killam is going to be a new member of Scrubs starting in January.

Well, that is all I know as of now. If these were all presents and stocking stuffers, it would be a very generous Christmas, let's hope the actual holidays for everyone else is this good. MADrry Chri- holidays to all and to all good... Late year holidays.

A day without Nicole Sullivan news is like a day without sunshine -- a notion which lends further credence to my theory that I am indeed a human bottle of talcum powder. For this journalistic foray into the golden lady's equally golden world, we will investigate a new animated series, an upcoming film, and another film which somehow eluded my watchful eye the first time around. (And yes, the requisite hairshirt and wooden paddle-inflicted bruises on my skull provide ample evidence of my shame on that last one.) If you can handle the excitement, then you are in the wrong place, my Sullivan-bashing friend. If, on the other hand, the sheer anticipation of this Nicole news finds you with froth on your upper lip, then read on, fellow mad dog. Just be warned that Nicole's future Oscar or Emmy will likely not come her way as a result of any of the following.

First, we look into Nicole's new animated series, "The Secret Saturdays," which is scheduled to premiere this fall on the Cartoon Network. Although Nicole needs another animated series about as badly as she needs toothpicks through her baby blues, we might as well take a peek at her latest dip into the cartoon pool (easily unsnappable bikini top unfortunately not included):

"In the new comedy-action series created by Jay Stephens; Doc, Drew and Zak Saturday are a family of world-saving adventure scientists called The Secret Saturdays. They live in a hidden base and are part of a network of scientists who protect against all of the underlying evil in world. To the Saturdays, ordinary folk-tales aren't just legends, but real-life mysteries and adventures. Traveling from the hot Gobi Desert to the icy Marianas Trench, they explore ancient temples and bottomless caves and tangle with twisted villains, including the masked madman V.V. Argost and his half-human/half-giant spider.

But aside from the adventures that span the globe, at the end of the day the Saturdays, along with their hyper exotic pets Fiskerton Komodo and Zon, are just a warm, loving family getting through everyday growing pains and squabbles."

Fie, V.V. Argost, thou wretched friend, you will not soon get away with your evil arachnid schemes! Nicole's Drew Saturday (the character she voices in "Secret Saturdays") will avenge thee with her righteous Raid and superstitious baloney. While I continue to shake my fists in mock defiance, I will inform you that twenty-six episodes of this fun-filled fantasy fest are slated to air this fall. Even though the ultimate Nicole Sullivan fantasy fest would obviously consist of none of these things, "The Secret Saturdays" will suffice for those who seek a G-rated equivalent. Anyone who falls into the latter category has my deepest sympathies.

Next on the Nicole agenda, we find out what it is like to be Seventeen Again. Granted, some of us would have to rewind the clock about twenty-two years or so; but that is a story for another time. As far as the movie itself is concerned, the adult incarnation of the guy who wishes to rewrite his life is portrayed by Matthew Perry, a name that will make "Friends" fans rejoice and will inspire horror in those with good taste. Meanwhile, Zac Efron will give the performance of a lifetime as the protagonist's seventeen-year-old incarnation. How does Nicole herself fit into this time travel? Your clueless guess is as good as mine, for no character description appears to be available at this time. Still, we have until February 20th, 2009, to find out since Seventeen Again will not debut in theaters until that date. Perhaps we will know by then whether an ill-timed blink or snore will cause a moviegoer to miss Nicole's part.

Finally, here is one from the "how in the hell did I miss Nicole's role in this the first time around" files: Superhero Movie. Unfortunately, I found a duplicate entry in the "why in the hell should anyone care" files; nonetheless, in case anyone does care, I am electing to see this through. This comedy film (a term used to identify genre, not laughter content) uses Spider-Man as its main target -- and yes, I am finding it nearly impossible to resist the inevitable reference to climbing the walls. According to the review found here, Nicole's Julia Riker character in Superhero Movie is but a wasted cameo; hence, my overwhelming desire to end this paragraph as soon as possible. Although the film itself has been out of theaters for a while now, those who missed it the first time around are in luck. The Superhero Movie came out on DVD about a month ago, and it includes all of the requisite bonus features: an alternate ending, deleted scenes, a tutorial on the "art of spoofing" (an art certainly best learned elsewhere), and a chance to meet the cast. I am guessing, however, that your chances to see Nicole herself in that final segment are about as good as those of your finding the movie hilarious in the first place. Still, if you are looking for a decorative coaster, then Superhero Movie might just fit the bill.

We Nicole Sullivan fans cannot help shedding a tear or two thousand as we witness the "MADtv" alum's rapid ascent to A-list status. What new depths will our beloved blonde comedienne be forced to plummet to in the near future as she continues that ascent? Furthermore, how can one plummet and ascend at the same time? The solutions to these and other quandaries are certainly not too far away.

UPDATE (09/02): According to this article, "The Secret Saturdays" will make its Cartoon Network series premiere on Friday, October 3rd, at 8:00pm EST. Get the Jiffy Pop ready as television history is made.

Those wild and crazy "MADtv" cast members are just popping up everywhere these days! Never fear, for "Rapid-Fire Appearances" is here to bring you up to speed.

Let's kick things off with the golden lady herself, Nicole Sullivan. Not even married life can hold back our gal, who will appear in a star-studded episode of "CSI: Crime Scene Investigation" in January 2008. Because the storyline for this "CSI" episode revolves around a rodeo, it's only fitting that professional cowboy Ty Murray be one of the guest stars, along with his girlfriend, singer and occasional actress Jewel. In the ultimate act of "yee-haw" showbiz nepotism, the episode will also feature Brendan Wayne (grandson of John) and Shooter Jennings (son of Waylon and Jessi Colter). Although we do not yet have further details on exactly how Nicole's character will fit into this whole, crazy scheme, feel free to read this article for more information, partner.

Do you have DirecTV? Neither do I, but subscribers may want to catch Aries Spears and Jeff Richards together in an upcoming episode of "The Supreme Court of Comedy." The series, which will air on DirecTV's general entertaiment network, the 101, has quite an unusual premise:

"'The Supreme Court of Comedy,' exec produced by Jonathan Murray, features real cases originally brought before small claims courts in California that will now be presided over by comedian Dom Irrera at the Laugh Factory in West Hollywood. The 'counselors' representing the plaintiffs and defendants will be alternating comedians.

Matchups include Sinbad vs. Tom Arnold, Tom Papa vs. Victoria Jackson, Jamie Kennedy vs. Aries Spears and Jeff Richards, and Tommy Davidson vs. Paul Rodriguez. Ten episodes have been ordered."

Although there is no word yet on when Aries and Jeff's episode will air, we will keep an eagle eye out for details. Will these "MADtv" alumni win their "case"? Will anyone without DirecTV give a rat's patootie? Drama ensues!

It's official: Orlando Jones never sleeps. In 2008, the Big O will add director R.A. White's comedy film Ye Olde Times to his mile-long resume. The film's plot involves two rival Renaissance fairs -- one cheesy, one priding itself on "serious productions of real Shakespeare." (Orlando's character belongs to the latter.) Jack Black, David Arquette, and Matthew Lillard will also join in "ye olde" fun. Curiously enough, no actresses are listed in the credits so far. The author of this article speculates on the possibility of man-love among the characters; however, the most likely scenario is the other she mentions: the old-school theater practice of having the male actors play both the male and female roles, thus negating the need for female actors. Oh, Orlando, what delectably daffy projects await your fans in the near future?

Finally, Phil LaMarr will appear in the 2008 Jonathan Fahn film Old Dogs, which centers around three men in their seventies who mistakenly pick up a bag of cocaine and find themselves caught between the police and the mob. Logic, as well as respect for the forty-something Phil, tells us immediately that his character, Joe, is not one of the three old men mentioned in the movie's title; however, at least from what we can gather, Phil does appear to have a sizable role in the comedy/drama, which stars John Saxon, Basil Hoffman, and Larry Gelman as the "old dogs." Can you teach an old "MADtv" cast member new tricks? Check out Phil at a theater near you to find out.

It appears that the nonviolent, rapid-fire gun is out of blanks for the time being. Do not be dismayed, though, because before you know it, the bullet chamber will once again be loaded with information on "MADtv" cast members' film and television appearances. Now that I have extended this unnecessary metaphor well past its target, all that is left to say is the following: stay tuned for more "Rapid-Fire Appearances"!

UPDATE (01/10): Nicole Sullivan's "CSI" episode debuts tonight at 9:00pm EST on CBS. Don't miss it!

UPDATE (02/25): Thanks to this article, we can now confirm that Ye Olde Times does indeed have at least one female star. Don't get too excited; it's just Lindsey Lohan. Although we still do not have word on exactly when this Orlando Jones extravaganza will be completed, a spring release seems realistic.

Because things tend to pile up with so many MADtv cast members making their rounds in showbiz (50 and counting), I've decided to kick off what will likely become a regular feature here at the site: "Rapid-Fire Appearances". In short, these articles will dispense with (most of) the usual journalistic fluff and cut straight to the chase on the latest cast appearances set to grace your television/movie screen in the near-future. Got it? Then let's begin!

First off, Artie Lange announced on Conan O'Brien a few weeks back that he will once again be appearing on Rescue Me this season. The usual first-stops for guest star listings -- IMDb, TV.com, et al -- were less than helpful at the time (and still are, in fact), but we've just learned that Artie's first appearance aired on July 25th. He, apparently, has a recurring role, so those who are interested will want to check out tomorrow night's episode. Rescue Me airs at 10:00pm EST Wednesday nights on FX.

Coming to ABC Family this August is Slacker Cats -- a new animated series featuring everyone's favorite long-departed cast members, Nicole Sullivan and Alex Borstein! For the benefit of those who didn't immediately skip ahead to the next item after seeing "ABC Family", here's the overly-detailed synopsis:

"Slacker Cats" follows two buddy cats, Buckley and Eddie, who slack their way through various unimpressive adventures. The half-hour, prime-time animated comedy series features the voices of Harland Williams, Sinbad, Kiersten Warren, Nicole Sullivan, Niecy Nash, Alex Borstein and legendary cult stand-up Emo Philips.

Does the show's prime-time slot indicate that we're in for something potentially appealing to those over the age of six? Tune in next month to find out!

Anyone remember Simon Helberg? Me neither. Nonetheless, this former MADtv featured player has landed himself a gig on the new CBS show, The Big Bang Theory, which features a premise I can only assume was lifted directly from my life:

THE BIG BANG THEORY is a comedy from the Emmy Award nominated Co-Creator and Executive Producer of "Two and a Half Men" Chuck Lorre, about brainy best friends Leonard (Johnny Galecki, "Roseanne") and Sheldon (Jim Parsons "Judging Amy"), who can tell you anything you want to know about quantum physics, but when it comes to dealing with everyday life here on earth they're lost in the cosmos. Neither fully understands that scientific principles don't always apply in matters of the heart - until they meet their sexy new neighbor Penny (Kaley Cuoco, "8 Simple Rules..."), a friendly screenwriter/waitress from the midwest who also happens to be newly single. She quickly makes an impression on the other members of Leonard and Sheldon's geek squad - Howard Wolowitz (Simon Helberg, "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip"), who portrays himself as the Casanova of Cal Tech, and fellow whiz kid Rajesh Koothrappali (Kunal Nayyar, "NCIS"), who is rendered speechless around anyone unprepared to converse about the Theory of Relativity or other scientific jargon. The chemistry between this gaggle of geniuses and a delightful damsel is about to undergo a stimulating series of inter-personal experiments.

The Big Bang Theory, eh? Oh, CBS -- what a wicked web of punnery you weave! Monday nights starting September 24th. 8:30pm EST. CBS. Be there. [Or not.]

Frank Caliendo fans will be pleased to learn that his new show, "The Frank Show" (one of the more imaginative titles to ever come out of Hollywood), is set to premiere on TBS "this fall". November 20th is the tentative premiere date, but this is subject to change between now and then. To whet your appetite, a number of preview clips have been made available for streaming on TBS.com. Why not check them out? Frank would do it for you if *you* were on TV!

Finally, in Phil LaMarr and David Herman news, details on the return of Futurama have finally surfaced! According to TV Squad:

Futurama is back, and now we know in what form. The show will return on November 27th as a full-length high-def film sold on DVD. It will be followed by three additional films, and each film will be divided into four episodes each to be aired on Comedy Central. So, that's 4 DVD movies or 16 new episodes depending on how you look at it.

Exciting news indeed for Futurama fans and nerds in general! I can almost count the number of days before the inevitable leak!

Special thanks go out to mizzimad for the Slacker Cats and Big Bang Theory leads. Join us again next time for another episode of Rapid-Fire Appearances!